.

yesh one month down, bb sept.

next thing to look foward to, next wed pub holiday, then pay day.

anw. this week. weekday ok.

fri. nth much.

sat. went amk with wil they all watch them buy psp. like za bor trying on clothes sia. first is compare price. ok thats fine. then choose colour. take dunno how long. then is choose game. wtf took like 1 hr plus plus. after every thing finish go collet psp then trying to distribute the game discs. whole thing like window shopping for clothes, trying on clothes, choosing design, and finally how to wear the damn thing also need so long. aracde a while, as usual. then go home nv do much go slp liao.

sun. morn go watch them bball. damn really wan play sia. then go wil hse rot then go woodlands a sec then go watch painted skin. wah nt bad sia c ppl so willing to sacrifice themselves. cliche though the movie nth much. then go teo hse rot. learnt the most basic mahjong lol. rot playing olk psp, then finally went home now blogging.

nth much this week. my eagle claws more or less fully learnt. every day new scratch wounds. wtf. weekend discussing about wil and tong lol. seems like i prob becoming stone alr.

prob let go liao hahas. time heals all wounds sia.
but scars remain.

but there's always plastic surgery haha.

.

yesh another week passed.

another happening week in office. lol think we getting scolded more and more often liao lol. noisy they say. = nothing to do. even the one sitting beside us also give us a lecture sia. lol. beter watch out or will be signing extras alr.

today, ie sat. a very peaceful day, maybe boring. morn wake up at 10 lol sleep more feel more tired. wake up play game lo. a nice bright sunny sat and im at home playing com what a waste. 11 plus went downstairs buy rice so many ppl downstairs coffee shop eating the breakfast, talking, reading newspapers, ppl at markets look see look see, so full of life. reminds me of stay in days where i treasure such liveliness. civi life. book in feeling.

afternoon rotted infront of com. wanted to go arcade play, but handicapped without my taps card zz.

night. went out for a walk downstairs, and saw some things. saw this very young boy climb a lampost with ease. no gloves no equipment. just hands and feet. im sure his parents never taught him how to do it. yet he do it so easily. zai. no fear.

walk somemore saw in cc wushu performance, just nice the taiji part. zai.

walk one big round to stadium there saw in the indoor court bball match taking place. watching the players, as well as the people watching the players. 感触良多haha. wad if i could be the one playing lol. and got ppl watching.

as i walk thinking about alvin chua's blog the tagboard, one comment is that someone say he need a gf to cure his loneliness. hmm alot ppl feeling lonely sia maybe this is the solution. hmmm maybe this is a biological need at this age and all. wonder y girls dun feel lonely at all. their blog nv say anything. lol prob its ns.

now im rotting again, trying to ignore this itch. fucking bleeding again. and seems like the skin is taking longer to heal compared to last time.

yesh next week will be sept end, and one month gone again.

.

A week of office politics indeed. like some of the colleagues say when i first came in, these ppl u help them they will take advantage of you. and these group of people are purely colleagues, nt frens. i now understand what they were saying. help ppl abit, and they say u're too free no work to do. wadever.

whole week kena nag about my skin and all. damn fed up. i'll put an end to all this. everything.

now i know wad it feels to be at the bottem, how sucky the feeling is, considering i've never really been down there, gd grades nt the worst at everything. now i know.

i'll end all of this. enough is enough. i'll prove it.

.

a short weekend just fly past nia.

weekday same old shit.

sat. decided to go to co lunch, which didnt really felt like going but alr agree ppl le so just go. wasnt that bad ba but nevertheless sian. felt like sleeping throughout. ler was also stoning so much. dun feel much anyway nowadays hardened and cold no feeling liao. after that went with ler go vivo buy tix then he zao le i go back dhoby arcade on my own. spam on ghost squad and bball. wandering around the arcade c chio bus c all the couple ar haiz cold wind blowww. xin han. haha. -.-. then go back vivo watch cyborg she lo nt bad movie main char very chio. nt that touching lol and the flashback make ppl confused nia spoil the movie abit. windstruck more zai lol super emo de sia. after that shop ard help wil decide wad to buy to give his next potential target. then go back dhoby find kh and frens at this pub nt bad atmosphere though i dun like drinking and all this. then go arcade play abit then go mac makan then go home lo. go home tok msn awhile only mum kp then have to go slp.

sun. bball. nt bad as usual. then go wil hse rot watch long hu men again then rot here rot there then zao home dota heng last match win. then rot in msn till now lo.

haiz dunno how to describe the feeling now. lol seems like everyone feeling like quite lost, sian, fucked up, sick and tired of this shit, plus many many more. "y u so negative about ns ar". after i saw this i swear i wun msg her again. nt angry. but just. i also dunno how to say. so easily can sweep this aside like its nothing like dat. feel very wad. even though i quite useless but still... lol now i c ns taking its toll on many ppl sia. while im out of all those chiong sua and shit. lol nowadays dun feel like goin out to c ppl, esp those nt rly close de. no face to c ppl liao lol. i wan to hide in one corner nia. i reply ppl i clerk, can tell the way they think change alr. i alr seen it. clerk = cui. rly is cui la i wun deny. but still no face to c ppl alr.

feel a mixture of empty, pointless, useless, and after all that, no feeling at all.

啊~~ 谁说我不在意空等候
原来 你从来都没深刻爱我
我才懂不是我不心痛
其实是心没了感受


anw... i noe teo will be stalking this, so, GD LUCK FOR UR BRUNEI TRIP!!! noe that we're ard, and u have ur bros in the ouside world outside of the damn army camp and ns and all.

.

woo this week was a slack week yay after 2-3 busy weeks. nth much happen, or at least compared to the last few weeks. fri somemore was sooo slack. went home so early sia after so early sia after like 3 weeks of ot.

anyway. sat. afternoon went watch death race. no comments the fact that we could sit nearly anywhere says it all. after that went arcade as usual, tc2 gun spoilt, so now woodlands arcade doesnt have anything to play at all, bball machine is different, no ghost squad, no tc2, well at least got tc3 and 4 ba. somemore is time zone i dun have card. after that went wil house, played ps2 for a bit, then suddenly they brought out the swensons cake to celebrate teo's bdae lol. sing song cut cake eat cake, i think the cake doesnt taste to its expectations ba, nth much. after that continued rotting on the ps2, then went eat kfc with 1 free whipped potato and cheesefries to call it a day. weekends seems to be getting cheaper. quite some time never been to town le, nv go orchard cine and all. went home as usual dota as usual lost as usual dunno y dunno how just die.

sunday rotted at home while kr teo olk and clement go amk rot. nothing to do anyway. haha clerk alr then can say like that. last time i'll be using every moment doing something just for the sake of doing it. now becoming more and more stone everyday, just watch as time moves past me. everything seems so pointless lol. just living day to day lor. like last time in cds just totally shut down until friday bookout day also not much feeling lol. one hole somewhere.

.

lol back to english for a while.

hmm more and more ppl their blog like to chu stunt sia. hidden words ah. must ctrl a to read a blog properly liao, esp when there are large gaps.

office work may not be as easy as i thought, though cannot compared to those combat side lol. this 2 weeks i think everyday tio zham lol busy busy busy. kena fuck left right centre. after monday one down another to go another person to get fucked by lol. i dun give a damn man. most impt is my medical review ahhh. coming soon 5 sept. just when my skin healed after a most jialat period i ever been. now back to scratching alr lol.

last weekend spent normally, go amk arcade whack ghost squad, noob lol. keep dying then nv complete then nv get anything -.-. arcade le go eat wait for olk arcade again -.-. olk show us HIS ghost squad lol. never see enemy enemy die le. after that as usual go wil hse watch movie. ride bike go rent movie feel that my skills improve abit lol after kena fucked by wil. nearly got hit by a lorry sia. reaching the zebra crossing saw the lorry coming. got the urge to chiong across cos wil before that keep telling me dun think. heng last minute choose to stop. cos i wouldnt make it in if i cross lol. watch a damn lame movie at his house, pure waste of time.

next week caught some of the olympics, esp sg table tennis. china owns sia. heng sg fought korea or else no silver liao. singles saw li jia wei getting fucked by zhang yining so sad. li jia wei si bei alot pattern each time she misses. completely diff from zhang yinning no expression at all. just like jay chou initial d. then the women single china vs china is damn zai sia. li jia wei seems noob alr.

this weekend did nth lol except pia dynasty warr at home. suddenly got urge to play. no arcade no nth.today saw bball gold medal usa vs spain. wah that is also damnn damn damn zai. later prob go catch the closing ceremony ba.

haiz going to 9 mth mark le. yh alr finish his course le alr 3sgt liao. wil they all bslc finish liao all posted out. as i stalk blogs during weekdays while ppl are chionging in camps, c uni life also starting liao. feel more and more loner sia after being a clerk. like now choose to stay at home nt go anywhere just diam diam. just waiting for the days to past by. i think i noe y alr cos i nv run at all this week. partly cos my skin sux, partly cos tio zham at office until morale damn low lol. hope they can give me 3sgt leh next yr rly hope can get. but judging from my performance now, error here error there, haiz no hope. lol at least we're hardworking.

as i read ppl blog about uni, i also think about next time uni, lol maybe next time can go join bball sia. but sibei noob leh how play. and lol next time go ntu got jurong point. there got a good arcade lol. nt bad.

but after all that, everything seems pointless in the end.

。

国庆日过咯。今年连国庆庆典都没看，真惭愧。

这个礼拜感觉上也比较难过，可能是因为要做完全不懂的事，而同事又一直说不会做啦，看到头痛啦。听了很烦，很想骂他，又不可以骂。拜五很不甘愿地去喝喜酒，结果没想像中的坏，只是食物没那么好吃。

拜六早上打球，和旧同学聚一聚。过后就去wil家，然后又出去看电影，然后又回去他家看电影。中间去游乐场玩一玩，没什么好玩的，没ghost squad，好闷。

拜天发霉，玩了几场，终于在最后一场赢了。

看到她的照片，已经认不出她了。哈哈，我已经完全不认识这个人了。

没什么好写，去睡了。